More beauty, and truth (are these always companions in some way?) this time in words:
“This is my dilemma… I am dust and ashes, frail and wayward, a set of predetermined behavioural responses … riddled with fears, beset with needs… the quintessence of dust and unto dust I shall return… But there is something else in me… Dust I may be, but troubled dust, dust that dreams, dust that has strange premonitions of transfiguration, of a glory in store, a destiny prepared, an inheritance that will one day be my own…So my life is stretched out in a painful dialectic between ashes and glory, between weakness and transfiguration. I am a riddle to myself, an exasperating enigma…this strange duality of dust and glory.”
Bishop Richard Holloway
Julia – "a destiny prepared".
I struggle with this because pre my husband's drowning I would have said I believed strongly in destiny, in fate, and yet now although I still believe it I kick against the possibility that we are part of some bigger plan, a plan which included taking Audrey's father away from those who love him.
We are so much more than dust, I believe that but yet believing it doesn't comfort me.
Love from London, as always,
Helen from Planet Grief xx