Things I’m Thinking About Doing

by | Aug 7, 2010 | 0 comments

Making the album I planned on making you with photos and memorabilia from your tours.
Eventually sifting through all of the memorial letters I received and putting them in a hard bound book for Audrey and I to read together one day.
Growing my hair indefinitely.
Buying a bunch of black to wear for a while- it feels right to me, but my only concern is if I ever go back to colors- everyone will think I’m “healed.”
Getting a tattoo to remember you – I know, I forbid you to get one but I can do whatever I want now.
Brushing my teeth with your toothbrush.

Putting a rubber band around and washing the lock of your hair I asked the funeral director for- it smells like embalming fluid and makes me sick.


August 7, 2010


Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You May Also Like…

December 17, 2014- A New Blog

It has been almost a year and a half since I last wrote on this blog.  In my mind, this blog was complete.  And yet, there was a lack of finality to it.  Grief has no finality, though it does have evolution and change, while this blog does have finality simply because...

Speed of Light

On the eve of your death I am watching town fireworks the day after the fourth of July. I am overwhelmed by the crowd of families around us on blankets with glo-sticks and cotton candy as we wait for darkness in the still, hot, summer air.  There is a Korean...

Father’s Day 2013

Father’s Day 2013

This is the third time.  It is brutal.I haven't felt it helpful or complex enough to say, "It's not fair; it's just not fair," in the past three years.  But on this day, I think those words a lot. Unless your young child has lost a parent, you cannot imagine...